Our loony tune life

This is something a bit different, I always talk about communication so here is an example of a letter, well poem I wrote to express to my sub how I was feeling. Open and honest feelings are important so I will give everyone a look at how it works for me.

I am trying to say it without causing a fight

To not make it sound like you are wrong I am right

I need to tell how I feel before things explode

I also know that much is to be said for how it is told

Things change as time moves on this, I understand well

How do I share what is becoming a personal hell?

I think I clearly expressed what is on my mind

Dreams and ideas that make me feel crazy all the time

What I want, what I think what I feel, words fail me

Never before have they, maybe because it is insecurity

Yes your logic is sound, but the idea keeps sniffing around

There must be a solution before I lash out or drown

How odd to me, this never would have been an issue before

There is a huge difference, you I love and adore

The hiding, lying and cheating all stopped with you

Even secrets are not a thing to have for us two

Now I am the keeper of secrets again, I don’t know why

I damaged you more than your injury when I made you cry

I ripped your soul open because that locked place in your mind

I could not just accept some things should be left alone for all time

I have cried myself to sleep many times in quiet frustration

For my unforgivable acts there is no proper compensation

I am far from the thing you met, you have changed much in me

I remember the destructive beast I once was happy to be

Shallow and self-serving, ungrateful for gifts given in love

The change so slow I did not notice it till I felt a nudge

The Texas sized mistake as she came with pretense to play

I never forget how angry you seemed that things went that way

I attract the crazy so often that is true, she was just another

I felt guilt I missed the sign hurting you to play with some other

Flirting and flaunting have subsided for the most part online

The beast side openly shown to keep them away from my line

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What has come of us, will we be the old couple that stares over tea?

Glory days behind as we feel the coming inevitability

Scratching days off the calendar, sharing the stories once again

You remember the time when we, oh yeah, well mind hearing it again?

I am angry inside, we are not supposed to wither and die

Maybe it is just me filled with my arrogance, vanity and pride

I am angry with Laura, shattered a situation I had hope in

I am angry with Covid as it has forced un into isolation

I am angry with myself for wanting to feel alive again

I am angry with your injury and not being able to play again

Other forces bear down from outside, I feel contempt for the world

My mother, brother and so much more like darts are hurled

I know I am petty and ungrateful because I want so much more

I promise you this when I leave each day I will come back through the door

You are my heart and soul, this will ever be true for all time

Please be patient with me as I share the things that are on my mind

Wicked Wednesday

 

7-30 The world we know

A thimbleful of madness mixed with the dregs of life, such a bitter wine

No such elegance to behold in this disheveled existence in time

Know no simple task has been given for the forgotten and downtrodden

Civility long ago forged now a memory in the mist dead and rotten

Time as these see goodness poisoned like an apple injected with poison

Greed and lust flow free and flesh is the only commodity within reason

Reason, oh it is unreasonable to look for it here, in the valley of filth

Climb and desecrate the dreams once held as pure, give in to wealth

Little else matters in this putrid festering realm, sell your body and mind

Tendrils sliding along the edges waiting to pluck dreams left behind

No taboo so vile it is not be dreamt, the dream a growing haunting need

Slithers in the bed of the dreamer it latches in place of dreams now dead

Fallow field of a broken mind, plowed by the vile broken creatures left behind

Seeds of lust, greed and desire tilled deep sprout into a thick choking vine

The tempting fruit that hangs just past the tips of starving lips, so inviting

Look but do not touch, touch but do not taste, taste but do not enjoy imbibing

If it were some sickly pallor it would not have such appeal to lure

Monsters the masses cry out but not one amongst them is pure

Rotten to the core as their cry for punishment of the one who tasted desire

A scapegoat now shackled and brought to the center for a symbolic pyre

The masses lusty cries for blood to be spilt ascending to a fevered pitch

Each chanter harboring personal desire that slithers yet is held in check

Rage for the one who dared to imbibe and enjoy, even become intoxicated

Rules they scream as the shackles hold them back, their venom placated

Morality mingles with mortality stones fly in a self-loathing sea of humanity

Found guilty by the corrupt the scapegoat now bludgeoned at their need

At the reading of the charged, the exposing of the crime to live outside rules

A seed falls and takes hold in the soft fertile soil of another in its youth

Walking home the seed is watered as spying eyes see a pleasing thing

Will this vine take hold and grow or be a hidden withered seedling?

Truth be told

Truth be told, I despise the cold, the chill to the bone that makes me feel old

Frozen in place hands over my face, I see the scene now set in place

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Polaroids spread on the table, the rope slung high in the stable

Under the pictures a silver disk, on it written she really wanted this

The camera still on the pod as I put it in, a flicker then the show begins

Arms tied and held over her head, unkept hair draped down the head

Bedraggled locks falling over her face, pictures frozen in time locked in place

The expression torn from time, that look of anticipation or sublime

Red flesh from heavy hands show clear, his game of pleasure and fear

She was just his toy along for the ride, his canvas to display with pride

Another picture showing the thick hand, she is no match for this powerful man

Her lithe body a plaything for his desire, that look in her eyes is a burning fire

Pulled close to his face she can feel his hot breath, a kiss that is taken at his behest

She could only struggle and fight in place, he had control in this dank place

The smell of hay in the old stall she was held in, his paradise to enjoy again

A nook that opened with a flip on the latch, implements hung for use inside that

A shiver had to have run along her spine, his fingers touching her so divine

The bench perfectly set in place, bent over and fastened in the space

Shuffling around the photos seeing what was done, seeing as she came undone

The flogger licking her flesh that glowed bright, such a sweet beautiful sight

I can imagine the sounds of her gasps echoing, his work undisturbed harrowing

On her toes as her body strains and writhes, the waves of pleasure crashes and subsides

His fingers rough now explore her wetness, her face flush, her thoughts anyone guess

A thrust as she shrieks at the sudden invasion, cold floods her from his creation

Glass toy left in a bucket of cold water, to cool the heat which he brought her

Parched lips now wetted from his finger, the taste of her wetness now lingers

The straw offered tastes of sweet juice as she sips, the cold fades inside her lips

A minute for her to recoup her composure, now again his hands take over

His hands grip hard into the tender flesh, rubbing and kneading her tender ass

No warning as the implement is quickly pulled out, hollow inside as she thrashes about

She whimpers and begs for him to take her, his hand strikes hard as he spanks her

Howls and shrieks as she was unprepared, everything his plan carefully prepared

The tempo staccato as his hand works feverishly, her ache now a burning need

Begging and pleading her voice now his song as the rhythm goes along

One hand working over her bright red flesh, the over exploring her slippery wetness

Over the edge in a crashing cascade she explodes, pent up need suddenly unloads

Milking every moment of ecstasy as she shakes, his mind inventory now takes

The rope appears and is lashed around a breast, she gasps, he works fast

Then another, her breast bound as he smiles, he had a plan all the while

A clothes pin snaps and she shudders as words like smacks he utters

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Each clip fastened she arches off the bench more, now untied with feet on the floor

Again, her hands are bound over her head, he stands back as she watches in dread

Flicking and playing with the rowel on the wheel, she ached to know how it would feel

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First a special touch for his evil plan, a bar to keep her feet apart as she would stand

Exposed to him, she was totally at his mercy, her cries brought him such glee

Each breast now felt the bite of the wheel, no words for what she should feel

Now she was lost in a world so surreal, she was his toy the images revealed

A blindfold next he used to cover her eyes, now everything would be a surprise

Unable to look away as he took her like a savage man, I knew this was part of his plan

Her anticipation as his moved his things around, gaging her reaction to each sound

The sound of the blade sent a chill over her skin, his hot breath as he said shall we begin

That moan as his hand slid along her chest, his hand on her throat she leaned back to rest

Teasing her body, sliding it over her skin, the cold steel on hot flesh a gasp I took in

Sliding between her thighs as his lips caressed down her spin, he growled and said you are mine

I jumped as I saw him raise quickly, she wailed as he plunged the handle to fill her need

He invaded her with the rough handle holding the blade, that look of pleasure on display

On her toes she was primal and screaming, I could not stop watching what was streaming

Pulling the handle out he tossed it to the floor, in a single thrust she was begging for more

Savage animal lust as he painted her skin, his red prints on her breast as she was full of him

His hand on her throat as he grunted and thrust, both lost in primal lust

The crimson running down over she soft flesh, my eyes fixated on what came next

A beastly roar as he unleashed his pent-up need, she shook as he used her in his greed

Holding tight for a minute he finally relaxed, then took her down and laid her on the sack

Cuddling her his hand running through her hair, it was just the two of them without a care

As the flicker turned to static there was a shock, need took over as I shook

A shower nearby I needed to take a moment to cool down, before I headed back to town

Turning the water on it was cold as ice, I took a deep breath and washed off my vice

Truth be told I hate the cold, but the film I had just watch made me feel nothing but bold.

Come see who else is being wicked

”Wicked
 

Mind Racing

My mind is racing

This old body is chasing

The past’s dreams erasing

Always life is out pacing

Just trying to survive

Turn the corner to arrive

The bus just left

Everything is a second guess

Youth in the mirror

The answer is clearer

Time is a terror

Life with heavy fetter

Run boy run, grab the brass ring

Tripping in the race knees sting

Body aching as bones breaking

Nothing given everything taking

Greed brings a harsh need

Need a wind in the reed

Shrieking sound of want

Passing thoughts that haunt

Always the grave waits open

Like pacman always gulpin

One day demanding it’s token

Till then running and hoping

Broken bleeding crying needing

Fallow mind twisted and screaming

The ache inside unable to hide

The scars of a wild life of pride

Chase the wind once again

Lost in the mass to blend

Never quite able to win

Fate tosses the die again

One day dust in the wind